Who we are, and how we came to be

Sometimes, you meet a person and there’s an instant “click;” an almost-audible moment when your heart recognizes theirs. Sometimes you’re drawn to their stories or the way they make you laugh, to the glint in their eyes or sheer awe at what they’ve overcome. Every friendship is a kind of falling in love.

This happened with my friend Samara. She read a post of mine on depression and I read one of hers on sexuality. That’s only the very beginning of the story but it is, in a nutshell, the heart of the Sisterwives! We are nine women bloggers who write about love and loss and struggles and joy. We cry and then we laugh bawdily because someone made a terrible pun.

We aren’t the kind of Sisterwives you see on reality TV. We are the kind who are sisters by will instead of blood or vows. Samara coined the term originally, and then she found more women bloggers who “clicked,” and they found even more, and soon there were nine of us. Nine – three squared – a number full of power, if you’re into math and magic.

But I should stop telling this particular story. It’s already being told, far more beautifully, in the inaugural post over at the Sisterwives blogging group: Who we are, and how we came to be.

Please visit to learn who we are, to read what we feel, and to see if you might be interested in guest posting! Because there may be just nine Sisterwives listed on the site, but there are infinite numbers of us in the world. Our goal is to discover, support, and highlight as many sisters as we can.

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42 responses to “Who we are, and how we came to be

    • I just read your bucket list! Any woman who wants to “pat a glacier” and be self-reliant for food has something marvelous to say. I’m glad to meet you.

      • Well thank you, ma’am! I’m going to have to post an update on my current veggie gardening disaster – Argh! I’ve been too busy weeding, wailing and beating my breast to write about it, but now that summer’s here and it’s too late to win the Battle Of The Weeds I might just as well take time out to vent. (I will win the war. Just not this year.)

  1. I love this in so many ways. This might be my favorite part: “We are the kind who are sisters by will instead of blood or vows.” Or maybe: “Because there may be just nine Sisterwives listed on the site, but there are infinite numbers of them in the world.”

    • I have a friend whose birth family was the far side of terrible, and she always talks about how her friends are the family she chose. I think we’re doing the same thing here. There are as many kinds of love as there are people.

  2. I’m so stoked for you guys Jennie, will follow with enthusiasm. Speaking if which, I think this calls for a new cocktail invented in honour of the SWs. Enjoy the accolades. Love REDdog

    • There was a book I read as a child that was very heavy into the idea of nine being the most powerful number of all. I’m also biased toward seven, because I have a scar exactly that shape on my leg. But yes, I believe in magic too – real magic, gritty magic, love magic. And I think our magic show will be breathtaking!

  3. Oh, my love, did I not comment yesterday?
    Well, let me just say what I always say.
    What I said when I read that post on depression and fell HARD for you.

    I love you, Jennie Saia. That is all.

      • Man, I’m jealous. I thought you two were kinda mine. I felt an ownership (for lack of a better word.) But here I stand, outside with my nose pressed against the window. Dang! Same as it ever was.

        • Come inside, Mark. (Double entendre much?!)

          Will it make you feel better if I tell you I dreamed about you last week? I was going to email you about it and then I thought you might decide I was a weirdo. But it was you, me, and Trent at a rooftop party, and everyone except the three of us was wearing furry mascot costumes. Paging Carl Jung…

          • Okay…wait…how about “special camaraderie?” That’s better than ownership.

            Never be afraid to email me your weirdness. Are you kidding? In some districts, you have to pay extra for that.

            I have another post up about long ago when an older woman taught me a thin or two. And not just the obvious thing. If it weren’t for my commitments. promises and true heart, I’d look for a role as the teacher this time.

  4. This made me catch my breath, Jennie – “Sometimes, you meet a person and there’s an instant β€œclick;” an almost-audible moment when your heart recognizes theirs.”

    That. Is. Perfection.

    Danggggggggg!

      • Ohhhh I had a moment like that the other day – not with people, but with a David Attenborough documentary – the first episode of the ‘Life’ series, where there’s this weird wee bug which INFLATES ITS EYE STALKS and you can SEE IT HAPPEN. Now, apart from being remarkable, because WOW, there was also that I could *feel* new synapses firing and new neural pathways being formed because this bug was ENTIRELY NEW to me.

        Thus it is with the SW sometimes – I am learning to be gentler, kinder, warmer, more encouraging – these might not be new neural pathways but they’re ones which have taken some heavy mortar fire throughout life. I’m learning to open my heart and gradually let some of them closer. It’s a fragile, terrifying process, and I feel very unsafe and off-balance a lot of the time, like I’m still a square peg trying desperately to look like it belongs in a round hole…but I know that in a way, we’re all square pegs and the holes change shape depending on the day or the direction of the wind…

        There are still a lot of barriers to come down before those pathways in my brain are able to function smoothly; before I’m going to be able to say those three words which seem to come so easily to many of the others. Before I believe I’m worthy of them. But I’m working on it, and I’m so thrilled to pieces to be included in this group. *SO* beyond-words thrilled.

  5. I have to laugh at myself bc I’m always so out of it! I have seen that Sisterwives logo and thought it referred to someone’s novel about polygamy! Gald to find out the true meaning. i will check you ladies out!

    • You’re definitely not the only one! It’s a weird name, but it’s what we’ve called each other for months and we’re too attached to quit!

      Plus, it kind of nicely encapsulates the idea that really close blogging relationships are half family, half infatuation…

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